Being a mom for the first time is exciting, confusing, and challenging at the same time. It is a journey from ‘I can’t wait to hold my baby in my arms’ to ‘I can’t wait for the baby to sleep’. Motherhood tests you to the optimal and expects you to be enduring it at all times.
Every new mother reading this out there should be able to feel what I am hinting at. It was just after one month that my daughter was born, that I had almost started feeling exhausted of all the household chores, attending to the demands of the newborn, struggling through the days to catch a nap, being hopeless about the pending laundry and nights where I made futile attempts to make the baby go to sleep. There was a time I even started reasoning why I needed to experience motherhood so much? What was I thinking before making this leap into motherhood? But then I saw my little girl musing on me with her twinkling eyes and those negative thoughts disappeared at a snap giving me ample reasons to choose motherhood.
The routine got repetitive and mundane. Rocking her through days and nights, feeding the little one at her beck and call, thus finding no room for myself. I was sipping down the coffee that was made hot but consumed cold. All that I needed desperately in the middle of this ordinary day was a long sleep and to be waken up by nobody.
The only source of enjoyment was playing with the baby girl during the afternoon hours and the conversation that I had with my handful was the most precious one that I miss when I see her grown up into a toddler now. Always being in a hurry to make her sleep and catch up on a nap or TV made me all troubled. Being a mother to an infant is so much about taking care of the needs of the baby that you forget that you need a break too.
Never thought of traveling so much apart from some weekend visits to family or friends’. May be sometimes at a favorite restaurant to make up for the rest of the tiring week that would keep her father away at work and both of us at home. Some family friends’ initiated a trip to hills, it popped out on me like a challenge and I couldn’t even think to take this one considering that she was just 5 months old.
PACKING!! This very word gripped my mind and heart! It would be like wadding the whole house- it was no more the same as before. Now we were three and not two. The third one was the smallest but her stuff would require time, effort, and space that would be the biggest. Deep down my heart I wanted this vacation, yearned to create memories with my daughter in the serenity of hills, wished to breathe in some fresh air but I was scared to take the next step. My husband motivated me and said it would be okay to put some effort into packing together because the holiday would be worth it. I smiled.
I made the list, maybe the longest of all times in my life. It was going to be my first trip with my princess. I laughed hard at the list of stuff that I had to pack along! I geared up like a soldier, I ate well, played some happy music in the house, and gave loads of toys to my baby. I kept her engaged in all the possible ways I could and went on with the packing. Finally, the big day came and I was still anxious ‘What if I have not packed anything that she might need?” “Check Feeders, Towels, Wipes,…...” I calmed down and let myself roll.
When we reached the destination it felt like one of the most appropriate decisions that I could take. The baby was happy, I was happy and we all were happy. It no longer felt the lack of sleep or that I was exhausted, I was much more animated, spirited and the girl I used to be. I thought it is all in our mind, we sometimes confine ourselves to one routine so much that we never dare to take up anything new. This trip was indeed rejuvenating and I explored myself to be dexterous and adventurous- a happy new mom (not to forget).
